The hard rubbish edition.
Who doesn't love hard rubbish? You don't? That's weird.
Blossoms, birds on the swoop and beautiful trash in the streets – no season beats spring for flagrant, fragrant and miscreant flanny wearing flaneurs like myself.
My area’s hard rubbish ended on Tuesday and boy, did I score.
First, hiding in a big pile near a main road under bags smashed tennis bats, cricket rackets, and dog eaten down to the cork cricket balls, I found these kid sized footballs.
They’re both leather, NOT ROAD BALLS – an Australian made Tommy Match and a Ross Faulkner “Native Brand” (eeeeek!). That white stuff on the Ross Faulkner is mould and there’s all sorts of yuck on both. The leather had gone hard but not as much as I had got when I thought…. FOOTY RENOVATION RESCUE!!!
So off to Bunnings’s to get some leather cleaning chemicals and oils and get to work! The confidence in the house of whether I’d succeed was lower than a Dutton’s dough-hole - a complete lack of interest in the project. Nobody wanted to help. Just screens. Jesus, kids these days. Back when I was young we only had Missile Command on the Atari, The Brady Bunch and Gilligan’s Island to entertain us etc..
Yes, I’m fun to have around the house.
Anyway, here’s the results.
HELL, YEAH. LET’S GO PLAY SOME KICK TO KICK.
But those beautiful balls weren’t the best pickup this hard rubbish collection season. Was with the kids at one of those library science sessions, a lovely young fellow, you’d like him, talking about how sound works, you know, waveforms and stuff, and I had to move the car. Near the car, a complete 1980 Sanyo hi-fi setup. Everything looked tired but not the tape deck!
I’ve been looking for a tape deck for years. I’ve got tapes I wanna hear, mixtapes I wanna make, and tapes like this I wanna suffer through.
Hooked the tape deck up to my system and it didn’t work. Opened up the internet and the nerds on the internet had similar problems so I opened it up and fiddled about and LOOK AND LISTEN TO THE IMPERFECT MAJESTY OF TAPE.
Yes, that’s my cut finger.
Believe it or not, this isn’t my best hard rubbish haul. February 1, this year there’s a bunch of boxes full of records outside a block of flats. An old bloke is going through them and I join him. It’s an incredible collection. I let the old bloke get what he wants. I don’t get greedy and leave a heap for someone else to get.
Friends, this is what I took home.
All the records are in beautiful condition and that AKAI thing works a treat. I like to hook it up to the computer and wig out on beats and drones, be farked if I knew what I was doing.
It’s a mystery as to why so much was thrown out. It looked like someone had all their stuff thrown out after being thrown out of their flat. My better theory is that it was a DJ getting rid of stuff that didn’t vibe them… no him… I’m pretty sure who it is because later in the week there were empty boxes from a music merch company of one particular artist. Won’t say who he is, but thanks, man.
Let’s score some hard rubbish piles in my area.
People throw out skis willy nilly in my area. They’re not cheap. A quick search and Rossignols can cost anything from $400 to $2,000. At least hang them up in the garage next to your picture of Mrs McGillicuddy or something. Christmas tree bases aren’t cheap either. 2344 points for audacity, Margaret.
I’m well and truly over Star Wars and all its needy children. No matter how much dull dialogue about interstellar political structures no viewer could possibly care about, it’s culture made for manbabies. I’m mostly cool with manbabies but I get uncomfortable when they have a go at the playground slide. They don’t need your help when they get stuck up there. 1,311 points, David.
Remember Saturday night dinner parties? Pre internet dinner party convo was about what was in the Good Weekend that day and when would be the best time in the night to drop a T. Drop a six pack of West Coast Coolers and Hahn Premium and into one of these bad boys and you’re in for a big one. 3,145 points.
Suburban garbage Rothko. Just 12 points, Margaret.
This cat looks like he f@&ked the neighbour’s cat. You’ll be right, mate. 4,033 points.
Who’s throwing out a table tennis table!?!? Me, if it was in my workplace. Sorry, that de dink de dong de dink de donk de dink de dong followed by OOOOH! gives me the irrits when I’m trying to work near it. I have just noticed the number plate so the table gets 11,293 points.
Some chairs just yell SQUAT ON ME D1CKHEAD at you. 5,022 points, Agnes.
This is the sort of chair I would get into trouble for taking home. Two hard rubbish seasons ago I found a set of Aristoc/Featherston dining table chairs. I took them to an auction house to get them looked at for a sale and they laughed me out of the building because they were the wrong shape and TOO BROWN. I’m still embarrassed but I’ll give this chair the respect I deserved with 18,394 points, Margaret.
What to watch.
That heartbreaking doco about Martin Phillipps of The Chills I talked about a few weeks ago is now on Binge. It might have just had its gazillionth episode, but I’ve just started watching the Cheap Seats on channel 10 and geez, it’s funny. So many good jokes per minute and a great vibe. Love it. Guy Mont’s Spelling Bee is pissfunny too. That last scene of Slow Horses was perfect and check out Spent on SBS.
It’s similar to Vernon Subutex, an English model has to go back home and visit her past. Fun characters. Worthwhile.
It’s 3:30am. Is that the time!? Goodnight!
I'm also a lover of the mixtape, I had a mate who made me so many amazing tapes with so much weird and wonderful songs that led me down so many musical rabbit holes, I just bought a book called Cassette from my Ex, a great collection of stories of the love of the mixtape and how it can connect people on many different levels.
My favourite time of the rubbish calendar! I have one of 'those' chairs that just needed rescuing. It wasn't allowed indoors, so now sits outside and supports a plant. My partner hates it! Good score with the cassette player!